Many people mistake "being supportive" with "telling people exactly what they want to hear". Let's be honest upfront-no one wants to hear things that might make them uncomfortable. When we paint a picture or write a song than ask for someones opinion on it, most of us want reassurance, not a critique on how bad it is.
It's the same for personal advice. You meet a great girl/guy, someone you are really interested in. After introducing them to all your friends they pull you aside and talk about how terrible the person is.That they are rude, obnoxious, sneering and cruel. You are stunned! After all, you are in love with the person and wanted reassurance instead of the honest truth. You accuse them of being "unsupportive" of your hopes, dreams and desires.
In reality, they might be acting based in the deepest love and affection for you. Like the modern psychologists say, this could be all about you. It's so hard to be able to put our own biases and emotions aside and accept honest feedback ourselves. It's not a strength of me either, for sure. If we listen to others our life will be much easier than if we think we can do it all on our own.
This post is inspired by a guilty pleasure of mine, 90 Day Fiancee. One guy getting married was going on wife number four. His best friend (surprise!) made it clear to him before the wedding that he thought it wasn't a good idea. Needless to say, Mr. Three-divorces-and-I've-apparently-learned-nothing didn't listen to his friend and accused him of acting like a jackass or being unsupportive.
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